Blackwood Gazette #108: New Location of Academy of Alchemists and Alliterators Revealed

By Basilio Mura, Nor Easter Correspondent

27/4- The zoning committee and city council of Oeil de Fleur have reached a decision regarding the new location for the Academic Alliance of Alchemists and Alliterators, and to the surprise of no one, not everyone is happy.

“This is [expletive removed]!” said Reynard Houlcombe, the owner of a hostel and bar in the district where the Academy will be relocated. “I have been running this business for forty years, and this is the third time these malcontents have been moved into my area of town. Every time they do, business plummets. These alchemists, they don’t drink. They buy one glass of absinthe, and they nurse it, all night long, trading quips and laughing loudly at things no one understands. They take up space and drive away other customers. I swear, they are following me around! I fear I will have to move again.”

The zoning committee is, of course, trying to spin the relocation of the Academy as a positive for the area.

“Despite their reputation,” one member of the board said, “The Academy continues to be a prime spot for foreign visitors. They travel from all over the world, coming to gawk at our lauded alchemical practitioners. Every time we’ve moved them, the district in question has seen a spike in tourism and enjoyed an economic boom as a result.”

“Sure, until they end up destroying the district in question,” said one resident when we told her of the committee’s statement. “It always happens. Could be the day they move in, or ten years from now. One day, one of those so called ‘geniuses’ is going to get the wrong notion in his head and blow us all up. Just you wait and see. I’m not, though. I’ve already packed and I’m moving in with my ma on the other side of the city.”

The members of the Academy are expected to start moving into their new building next week. They have spent the weeks following the fire that claimed their last location in the Imperial Palace, where it is said that Empress Bastian has greatly enjoyed their company, but is ready for them to go.

Blackwood Gazette #108: New Location of Academy of Alchemists and Alliterators Revealed

Blackwood Gazette #107: Venue Review- The New Empress Theatre

By Alex Grosset, Arts and Entertainment

24/4-I recently had the honor of attending the grand opening of the New Empress Theatre in Oeil de Fleur, and while the show I attended, “Fires of D’kalm D’korr” is still the same steaming pile of popular garbage that it was last year, I am happy to report that the venue is better than ever.

The first thing I noticed was that, despite being built on the same lot and constructed to roughly the same size, the new theatre is a veritable cavern compared to the old. The previous Empress theatre had a lower roof to accommodate an attic for the storage of props. This new build features a two level basement, allowing the auditorium to extend to all the way to roof level. Likewise, dressing rooms and management offices have been moved underground as well, allowing a larger stage to allow for more dynamic sets and larger casts.

The play itself, while still terrible in terms of its subject matter, used this extra space to increase its spectacle. The larger stage allowed for more impressive battle scenes, and new lighting rigs both on stage and throughout the auditorium immersed the audience during Hostander Alleroy’s nighttime soliloquy in the second act. Unfortunately, I fear these technological advances will only endorse more vapid spectacle in the future, rather than good storytelling. Still, I have hopes that with the right playwright and director, this extra space and lighting could be employed to riveting effect.

The seating, likewise, has undergone a major improvement. Seats on the floor are now arranged in a semi-circle around the stage, similar to the concert hall in Yves, so that even attendees on the outer edges get a good view of the stage. Balcony seating is constructed similarly, and the higher ceiling offers a third row. The seats have all been upholstered using soft leather, ensuring greater longevity and a decreased chance of spreading lice, I am told. I heard others grumbling about discomfort, and the noise of people shifting their weight (at one point, such shifting resulted in a noise not unlike flatulence, disrupting what I am told is meant to be a key emotional beat) but I had no such complaints.

All in all, I had an enjoyable experience. The new theatre is beautifully constructed, both inside and out, and I found much amusement during intermission and after the play, picking apart its short comings with my fellow critics. The only blight on the evening was the protest outside, deriding Delando for his deception aboard the Heisenberg. I would have joined them, but for entirely different reasons.

Blackwood Gazette #107: Venue Review- The New Empress Theatre

Blackwood Gazette #106: Julianos’ Forces Issue Bounty on Bandit Responsible for Soldiers’ Death

by Chester Seaton, News

23/4- The investigation into the deaths of five Julianos soldiers in a small Monteddorian farming community has already borne fruit. A spokesperson for Julianos issued a statement today about the suspected assassin.

“We believe we are looking for a woman named Dougherty,” the spokesperson said. “She is the daughter of a Monteddorian woman and a Crowndonian expatriate named Alexander Dougherty, a deserter of the Air Corps who left the northern empire after the Minor Disagreement thirty five years ago.

“She is dark of hair, in her late twenties/early thirties, and said to favor her Monteddorian mother, which will allow her to blend in with the populace, except for a mess of scars and tattoos on her arms. It is reported that she keeps these covered with long sleeves.

“Though she is unremarkable in appearance, eye witnesses say she carries a revolver. Given the rarity of such weapons, and even rarer the possession of such weapons by Monteddorian women, we have faith that the bandit named Dougherty will be found soon.”

Julianos has issued a 200,000 tallo (roughly 20,000 gold pieces) bounty for Dougherty, dead or alive, and a 50,000 tallo reward for information leading to her capture or death. The statement also states that Dougherty is travelling with a platoon strength force of supporters. That force is slowly growing larger, as Dougherty is actively recruiting.

“We stress caution when trying to deal with Dougherty,” the spokesperson said. “Though most of the people supporting her are merely farmers, the numbers and fervor with which they are said to defend her have already become storied in the region.

“She’s become a hero among the folk. We must proceed with caution.”

The Bandit, "Dougherty"
copyright@blackwoodempire.com. Drawing by Ryan Pierce

 

Blackwood Gazette #106: Julianos’ Forces Issue Bounty on Bandit Responsible for Soldiers’ Death

Blackwood Gazette #105: Missing Professor Found, Babbling Incoherently

by Chester Seaton, News

22/4- After months of silence on the part of Colonial authorities investigating the disappearance of a team sent to find out what fate befell the citizens of Lelina, including the Gazette’s own Adella Chatelaine, we’ve received word of a major breakthrough.

Early last week, a man was discovered on the outskirts of Point Hammond, fifty miles north along the Miskaton River. Law enforcement for the town say the man was bleeding from small cuts all over his body, likely sustained by bramble bushes in the wilds surrounding the area, and was babbling incoherently.

He was taken into custody and held in the town’s drunk tank, where he fell unconscious for two days before a doctor was called in from a neighboring town. The doctor reported that the man was suffering from shock. A day later the man awoke, and during a brief spell of lucidity, identified himself as Professor Martine Babin of New Crowndon University. He claimed to have no memory of anything past getting on the river boat in Docryville. Shortly afterward, he slipped back into his fugue state.

No word has come on the details of his ramblings, though an unnamed source described them as “disturbing.”

Investigators have turned their attention to the wilds around Point Hammond. We here at the Gazette pray for positive news regarding the fate of the Lelina team.

Blackwood Gazette #105: Missing Professor Found, Babbling Incoherently

Blackwood Gazette #104: Colonial Militia Prepares to Mobilize Against Von Grimm Gang

By Hil Spencer, New Crowndon Correspondent

21/4- Two weeks after losing the frontier outpost Fort Winstone to the nefarious bandit Doctor Argyle Von Grimm and his gang of mechanically enhanced miscreants, the colonial militia says that it is ready to make a second push to retake the fort.

“The push can’t happen soon enough,” Field Marshal Ameron Lassiter said. “The Von Grimm gang has terrorized the colonial frontier long enough, and this latest episode has been especially trying, from a morale standpoint.”

Lassiter is likely referring to the idea, expressed by many citizens along the frontier, that the takeover isn’t representative of any actual threat, but merely a bruise on the militia’s ego.

“Things have only gotten worse ‘round here, last couple weeks,” a man from Craw, a small town one hundred miles away from the fort, told us. “And it ain’t because of Von Grimm’s gang. It’s ‘cos all our militia men are off gatherin ‘round that old fort that been of no importance for fifty years, watchin Von Grimm, and left us open to be robbed by these other varmints runnin’ ‘round here; the Clammets and the Rogs, the Darners and Tarvers.”

Lassiter claims the militia is not unaware of smaller gangs making their move now that the Von Grimms are holed up.

“We understand the frustration of the townsfolk, but those smaller gangs are second fiddle to the Mad Mechanist. This is a man who has cut a swath of terror from Nor Easter to Old Crowndon, and down the coast of Monteddor. He brought down Waystation Delta, and he’s blazed his way through the colonies out to the frontier, pausing only to kick puppies and steal candy from babies. Yes, he’s actually done that; that’s the kind of monster we’re dealing with. We’ll turn our attention away once he’s dealt with.

“It won’t be long now. Our squadron of Dragonflies arrives from the capital in the next few days. We’ve fitted them to drop fire jelly. We’re going to turn that fort into a boiling pot of bandit flesh and molten copper.”

Blackwood Gazette #104: Colonial Militia Prepares to Mobilize Against Von Grimm Gang

Blackwood Gazette #103: The Heisenberg Crash: Is Anyone Really Surprised?

By Sir Rigel Rinkenbach, Guest Editorial

20/4- Let me just begin this piece by saying that any loss of human life, no matter how small or trivial, is a tragedy. I am not writing this, however, to wax poetic about the deaths of those on board the Heisenberg or offer pretty platitudes…anyone with any modicum of power and a pulpit from which to wield said power has done so in the last week. And besides, those on board were hired for the expressed purpose of fulfilling the function they, well, fulfilled by dying in place of people like our illustrious Empress, Her Imperial Majesty Marcellete Bastian.

No, the purpose of this piece is to ask the question, is anyone really surprised that the Heisenberg went down in flames over the Crowndon country side?

I, for one, am not. I expected it. Had I been on the passenger list, I likely would have employed the same diversionary tactics of those other high profile individuals. Why, you ask? Because I, and we, are not morons (with the exception of Miss Tralala…that poor, pitiful soul). And one would have to be such a moron as to get on board an aircraft constructed by the Crowndonian government for the express purpose getting said aircraft into the air before someone else.

Admittedly, that someone else was me. It is true, I egged Crowndon on by challenging Ivan Klankenvroot to an industrial race to see who could build the world’s first commercial fixed wing aircraft. I admit to and take on whatever weight of responsibility that fact bestows upon me.

I do believe, however, that had Klankenvroot been allowed to continue working on his project without the heavy hand of Crowndon crashing around in his metaphorical toolbox, the Heisenberg would have been a technically sound marvel built by the hand of a master craftsman, rather than the scrambled together heap of metal beaten into shape by the cudgels of military ‘engineers’. He would not have beaten me, but it would have been something to see, indeed.

No, it was the interference of the Crowndon Oligarchs, and to a lesser extent the series of unfortunate events of last year that led to a decline in Crowndonian national pride, that caused a lack of quality assurance in the interest of meeting a deadline. It is even more tragic when you consider the fact that I abandoned this race months ago. I had largely forgotten about it until I heard the news. They rushed to meet a deadline that no longer existed.

Citizens of the Triumvirate, I ask you not to be angry at those pillars who simply used time worn diversionary tactics to ensure their own safety; they did what they would have done regardless of who built it (though I’m sure all 122 passengers would still be alive if Klankenvroot had overseen construction. And had we been testing my own design, I never would have allowed this media circus of putting people of power on a test flight to begin with. I would have tested it in secret first and then STAGED a second test flight for the amusement of the citizen). Turn your ire instead on the puppet masters who have their bloody paws on the crank of the meat grinder that is Crowndonian government: the long standing, backwards facing Oligarchs. For they, like it or not, are one link in the chain of Imperial industry, and they are beyond any doubt the weakest.

Blackwood Gazette #103: The Heisenberg Crash: Is Anyone Really Surprised?

Blackwood Gazette #102-Julianos Soldiers Found Slaughtered; Full Strength Garrison Moves In

by Isairo Palantes, Monteddorian Correspondent

16/4-The newly formed security forces of Alejandro Julianos are being tested this week as the tensions between the new regime and farmers in the region have reached fever pitch.
Earlier this week, five soldiers tasked with overseeing crop collection lines were found dead in a local brothel, their throats cut and their weapons stolen.

“We swear, we have no idea who did this,” said the owner of the brothel, one Serita Ines Dionisio. “It certainly wasn’t any of mine; the men who were killed had just arrived, and I sent them upstairs to wait. They were already dead when I sent the girls up.”

In response to the death, Alejandro Julianos himself ordered a full battalion to move in and reinforce the soldiers already in the town. The local residents aren’t happy.

“These upstarts don’t get it,” said one man, who asked to remain anonymous. “They get mad, they stop thinking. I don’t like all these men either, or these new tithes. But you kill five, you get ten more for each one, standing on every corner, watching every move you make and just looking for an excuse. Yes, part of me wants to give these glorified goons the boot, but part of me also wants this assassin found, because until he, or they, are identified, these men see us all as a threat. Even then, who knows?”

Blackwood Gazette #102-Julianos Soldiers Found Slaughtered; Full Strength Garrison Moves In

Blackwood Gazette #101-SCANDAL: Heisenberg Passengers were Servants of People Reported to be on Board

by Chester Seaton, News

15/4- The best word that can be used to describe the atmosphere around Triumvirate High Society this morning is ‘confusion’. Just a day after finding out that several high ranking members of the community had been killed in the tragic Heisenberg crash, including the Empress of NorEaster, we now learn that all but one of the high profile passengers were not on the plane at all.

Empress Bastian…alive. Playwright Delando…alive. Tobacco magnate Archibald Starkfeld…alive. This list goes on, of people not only rich enough to afford tickets on the maiden flight, but rich enough to hire others to go in their place and convince the world that they had been a part of this history making event.

So, yes, confusion is the word to describe it. On the one hand, the leader of one of our three Empires still lives, likely averting a power vacuum and a ton of finger pointing and accusations between NorEaster and Crowndon. On the other hand the Empress, as well as others, filled the plane with servants and body doubles groomed to convince the world of their presence on the plane, and in so doing take all the glory without any of the risk. Publicity photos released after the event of passengers boarding were staged (all photography was contracted out). Yes, one hundred and twenty people are dead. However, we can say that of that number, the only person of any importance to die was Pipi Tralala, a dubious claim at best.

Blackwood Gazette #101-SCANDAL: Heisenberg Passengers were Servants of People Reported to be on Board

Blackwood Gazette #99-New Empress Theatre to reopen its doors in Time for One Year Anniversary of its Destruction

By Alex Grosset, Arts and Entertainment

13/4- Thousands are expected to gather in Oeil de Fleur to attend the ribbon cutting ceremony for the New Empress Theatre. The world famous Theatre burned down one year ago during a performance of Delando’s “Fires of D’Kalm D’Korr”.

The rebuilding of the theatre has been met with several trials and tribulations over the past year. First, the Council for Arts and Commerce had an internal debate over whether or not the Theatre should be rebuilt at all or instead be replaced with an outdoor market. This of course led to people questioning the logic of a Council of combined “Art” and “Commerce”. The Council was split in two, and the artists won out when the Academy of Alchemists and Alliterators, led by former alum Sir Rigel Rinkenbach, threw their weight behind the theatre.

The second setback came during the winter months, and the recent Blackwood shortage. While Nor Easter was relatively unscathed by the shortage compared to Crowndon, it only managed to maintain its level of comfort by halting any ongoing projects, including the rebuild.

Construction resumed in the early weeks of Second Month, after the Desantana Blackwood Conflicts sorted themselves out. Much of the construction was already complete; all that remained was some wiring and the installation of the theatre’s new fire suppression system.

The New Empress Theatre will open its doors this weekend, with a showing of Delando’s “Fires”. The performers will not be using flare guns to simulate magic this time, we are told.

***

Related: Blackwood Gazette #4: Tragedy Strikes the Empress Theatre in Oeil de Fleur

 

Blackwood Gazette #99-New Empress Theatre to reopen its doors in Time for One Year Anniversary of its Destruction

Blackwood Gazette #97-Imperial Super Prison Nearing Completion

by Chester Seaton, News

9/4-The controversy surrounding the Triumvirate’s joint project, an ocean-borne maximum security prison, continues this week as details leaked concerning the prison’s progress.

According to the leak, the project had been in development for years before its official announcement last year, with construction having begun nearly two years ago. As a result, the prison is nearly complete, and is scheduled to set sail within the next few months.

Other details in the leak point to prisoners already being held in completed portions of the ship, which is currently in dry dock in an undisclosed location. This has led to citizens across the triumvirate to make inquiries about family members currently incarcerated in maximum security prisons.

A spokesman for the project, currently codenamed ‘Delphinidae’, spoke with press this morning about the allegations.

“The information concerning the construction of the prison is largely accurate,” the spokesman said. “The ship is nearly completed, and will set sail shortly. As for allegations that prisoners have already been transferred aboard, without notifying their families, they are completely false.”

Blackwood Gazette #97-Imperial Super Prison Nearing Completion