Blackwood Gazette #42: Letters to the Editor, Week of 14-18/7, 280 YoT

by Maurice Merchant, Editor in Chief

I feel I must take umbrage at the way you are reporting the Waystation Bravo Incident. A few days ago, you reported that a device had been discovered attached to the station’s boiler. But you failed to report on the theories concerning what that device might be, including the fact that some believe it is responsible for the storm that caused the station to go missing in the first place. Call me crazy, but isn’t that a huge part of this puzzle?

Vermina, in Walsh

Dear Crazy,
We here at the Gazette are fully aware of the speculation surrounding the purpose of the device in question. We did not report on it at that time because the speculation did not exist. And even if it had, that speculation is not being put forth by the investigators involved. In fact, the only source I can find that is putting forth the notion that the device some how controlled the weather is Oculus, a man who puts forth no evidence for his ‘theories’…he simply makes broad statements, and when something happens that even remotely resembles those statements, claims to have predicted the event.
Don’t believe everything you read in the paper, Vermina. Unless it’s ours, of course.

****

Mister Merchant:
I cannot believe that a paper as (formerly) prestigious as the Blackwood Gazette would hire a writer like that Eli Knickeannie Wilderspinner. He’s such a HACK!!! How dare he suggest we give a medal to that TERRORIST and PIRATE Roderick La Pierre. It’s because of HIM that the Crowndon military is about to be forced to MURDER a bunch workers at that factory. You should FIRE Wilder-Ninny immediately, because if you don’t, I will UNSUBSCRIBE. That goes for your entire Nor Eastern office, too. FIRE THEM ALL!!!! Your FATHER would be ASHAMED, Mister Merchant. ASHAMED. And you should be ASHAMED. SHAME ON YOU, Mister Merchant. You HACK.

Charles, in Toring

Dear Charles,
NO.

****

is it true that adella chatelaine is leaving the gazette i heard shes leaving the gazette is it true i don’t want her to leave shes the best thing to happen to the gazette in forever and shes the reason i started reading you cant let her go her articles are the only thing that gets me through because shes just that good and if something happens to her in the colonies then im gonna hold you responsible mister merchant this is just your way of getting rid of the nor eastern branch isnt it you jingoistic bastard i know people in monteddor and i know people in sarnwain and in rommsbach so you better watch out how could you do this
thank you for your time

adellafan, in sau anoit

Dear adellafan,
Miss Chatelaine is not leaving the Gazette. Her role has simply changed. And I have not sent her anywhere; she chose to pursue the story with Veronica Trenum on her own accord, and I wholly support her decision. It will lead to great things in her career. She is a brilliant writer and the Lelina story is a huge development in the field of archaeology. So please, call off your dogs in Monteddor and Sarnwain and Rommsbach and wherever else you know people, and calm down. Perhaps seek the professional services of a therapist, or maybe a copy editor.

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Blackwood Gazette #42: Letters to the Editor, Week of 14-18/7, 280 YoT

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